Exciting news Star Trek fans; we've teamed up with Cryptic Studios to give away three beta keys for the closed beta test of the upcoming MMO, Star Trek Online.
If you'd like to get a chance to try out STO before the majority of other players, and help Cryptic iron out issues in the game of course, you must simply put a caption to the image below.
To take part, post your caption in the comments. We will read all of them and choose our favourite three. The winners will be contacted on the email address they used to register here at IncGamers. We'll post their names in a news item as well, just in case.
You have one week to think of a fitting caption, be it witty, serious or just downright daft. One entry per person please. The competition closes at 12 noon British Summer Time on Wednesday 30 September.
If you're one of the lucky winners, you'll be playing on the CBT sometime before the end of the year. Good luck, get thinking!


User comments
Captain James T. Kirk: I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
Oh wait wrong movie!
Captain James T. Kirk: I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
http://www.smh.com.au/environment/sydney-turns-red-dust-storm-blankets-city-20090923-g0so.html
And I'm wondering how soon I'll be dead...
(To the tune of "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head")
--Not sure if we could submit more than one, but what the heck :P
F'Chang TRANSPORT THE MONGREL TRIBBLES ONTO THEIR SHIP
Captain: "Are you kidding?! It was the best idea I ever had!"
*Sigh*
And up goes our insurance premiums. The Ferengi must be salivating with glee. Nice flying, ensign. Be sure to report to the Engineering Chief to help out with removing the dents from the hull.
captain: well just be sure that your mothers recipe for bean burritos does not make it into the food replicator.
* "In plain, non-Vulcan English, we've been lucky" -- McCoy
* "I believe I said that, Doctor" -- Spock
"Yes Captain, the photon torpedos are functioning"
Ensign: Uh captain the whole universe saw that...
Captain: NOBODY SAW A THING!!
My Caption:
'Asteroids - provided by Star Trek Online gamers everywhere. Now Universal not only has a plot - "...some guys in spaceships blowing stuff up" but real story boards to go along with the concept.'
-actual quote provided by producer Lornezo di Bonaventura - http://au.movies.ign.com/articles/100/1006589p1.html
Be Well. Be Well Quoted.
Theocrat Issak
"It's not my fault! If they had let me beta test I would know how to actually fly this thing!"
*BOOOOM*
Kirk: Face it Khan, I'm older and I have more insurance!
Captain: Shut it Redshirt! Don't make me put you on an awawy mission you won't come ba... Nevermind
Leaving system at maximum warp.
Must make sure to never host a Klingon Rite of Passage ceremony ever again. Especially since bloodwine makes one very talkative and thus show the Klingons how to arm and fire the Tricobalt devices.
End log
"Next time Wesley, I'll drive."
Worf:It didn't say ANYTHING! It can't even talk-
What's gotten into you??
Picard: Shun the non-believer- SHUN!!!!!!
Worf:.....Have you been drinking whatever Q gave you again- I told you it would give you hallucinations!
Against my better judgment, I allowed Ensign Ricky to take the helm today...
Worf:It didn't say ANYTHING! It can't even talk-
What's gotten into you??
Picard: Shun the non-believer- SHUN!!!!!!
Worf:.....Have you been drinking whatever Q gave you again- I told you to lay off that stuff-it gives you hallucinations!
*snort, snort*
"Did I do thaaat?"
"URKEL!!!!"
captain: wait.. whats that giant thing.
scince officer: oh its just a hive mind, luckily our chief engineer is issac clarke.
NEW Astro-Coco-Puffs!
HIGH in Protein!*
LOADED with Chocolatey Goodness!**
FREE*** derelict spacecraft inside each tasty puff!
*protein may not be digestible by all species. Refunds will not be supplied on account of incompatible biologies.
**moral alignment of chocolate planetoids is not guaranteed.
***salvage, towage and discovery fees will apply and are legally binding upon purchase of each astro-coco-puff.
oh man i can't wait for this game, i have been reading every single bit of info posted on the net. I have my fingers crossed, please incgamers make my dream come true.
"I am Fluffy Destroyer of Worlds OBEY ME!"
Kirk: "Khaaaaaannnnn!"
Captain James T Kirk: Umm , Spock what did you hit? Umm ,nothing captain. Kirk looks at Spock, Spock raises eyebrow.
Commander Burnquist: Double or nothin'.
Astrometrics Chief: Not really, the Captain is the main character.
Admiral...do you think it was wise to send Worf on a diplomatic mission to Planet Tribble?
Flagship Crew = 25 Million bars of gold pressed latinum
Bioneural Circuitry to support the most advanced computer system yet designed = 50 Million bars of gold pressed latinum
Trans-Deck Holoemitter array = 45 Million bars of gold pressed latinum
Ramming the only solid object within 5 parsecs = priceless
On the Starship Enterprise under Captain Kirk.
Star Trekkin' across the universe,
Running into planetoids 'cause we can't find reverse.
Lt. Uhura, report.
There's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim.
Analysis, Mr. Spock.
It's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's life, Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain.
..........
Jason Nesbit: Oh, like you know!
(Don't let this happen to you! Don't drink and drive!)
Gimme a break,
Gimme a break of that Pla-net-oid.
(To the tune of the Kit-Kat Bar song)
Mmm.... I love cruising in the Cheese Star system these Cheddar planets are to die for full cheese-grinder-ahead!!!
"And there is my house, third from the end, with the new pool. And if you get real close you can see my neighbor who likes to sunbathe naked."
[Inside the Ship]
Captain: "What is it Ben?"
Ben: "I felt a great disturbance in the force. As though millions of voices cried out in terror, and then suddenly silenced..."
Captain: "...So, this is your first hit and run I take it?"
"Well at least they finally met their quota..."
Buying the location of the planet - 2 bars of gold pressed latnum
Revenge - PRICELESS!!!!
High Density Tritanium Armor: 4,500,000.00 credits
Living through Sulu's Driving Exam: PRICELESS
Kirk: Trouble? That was the Tribble home world. We should get a commendation! Might even wrangle an upgrade to a Constitution class vessel for our effort. I say, ‘job well done!’
Scotty: Aye, t’was no tribble at all...
*Crash!* *Captain glares at the Helmsmen*
Captian: Make that a Class D planet...
Came thro' the jaws of Death
Back from the mouth of Hell"
-Excerpt from The Charge of the Light Brigade
CO: How could you tell?
Science: The residual quantum particles, signs of deep core min-
XO: And the face of the Grand Nagus is carved into that passing asteroid...
CO: I hate Ferengi.
Captain: "Pay attention! Look what you just did!"
Ensign: "I am just saying, look at the picture, shes hot! There I said it!"
Captain: "I hate you noobs."
"Sir, a Message from Starfleet. They want us to use a Tri-Lithium warhead on Romulus' Star to cover up the incident."
Captain: ... Ensign that was the new Tricobalt torpedo launcher... Not the sensor array
Because without that new warp engine you would never be able to get far enough away to say that the planet breaking apart wasn't your fault.
work.
Captain:"Why did you hit that moon!"
Helmsman:(after a few seconds answers)
"Sorry man, was AFK."
Ensign: "0.00000257 percent sir…."
Captain Bauer: "Damn it!!!"
Geordi: But I'm doing just fine Captain!
Captain: "........"
First Officer: "......our bad...."
Tactical Officer: "Did we just hit something?"
Coco puff planets do indeed exist . The attempt to sample the planet however ended in catastrophic failure. Causing the planet to explode in a shower of chocolaty goodness .Sonny in a state of hysteria hijacked a shuttle, in a suicidal attempt to get samples. Unfortunately making us realize, that the rumors are true . He really is cuckoo for coco puffs.
"Ensign, sometimes you have to,"
"This isn't the bingo house..."
The adventures of the USS Magoo
http://www.tvsinopse.kinghost.net/au/m/mr magoo_arquivos/mr-magoo2.jpg
Number 1: But Sir, there's a Planet coming in on our sensors.
Captian: Quick! Use the Picard Maneuver!
Number 1: But don't you think that's a LITTLE risky?
Captian: We don't have any choice. Besides Number 1, what's the worse that could happen?
Number 1: Very well then, Sir. Helmsman! The Picard Maneuver!
Helmsman: Aye Sir! Going to Warp 9!
Number 1: Praying to god.
Helmsman: Aye Sir! Praying to god!
Cost of starship: $20,000,000,000
Cost of planet: $500,000,000,000,000
Sneezing while attemping evasive maneuvers: Priceless
That was a fart, "hurry" get the hell in your space suites or hold your breath!!!"
He evil laughs ^_^
Spock: It appears someone replaced the Dilithium crystals with Folgers crystals.
-Chocolaaaaaaaaate .....
After a few too many drinks in Ten Forward, The Captain stood up and said, 'We have to see whether that planet actually tastes like chocolate, it's gonna be legendary!!'
Present:
'I think I took a bit too big of a bite there!'
-I´m rubber you are glue
Captain : "Helm, did we just hit something?"
Helm : "Uh...no sir?"
Pac-Man
It's not a good name for a ship.
Captain: Hmmm maybe we should rethink vindaloo night.
Engineer: Captain warp engines were damaged, we can not now used. There are impulse engines ...
Captain: So full of impulse forward!
Homer : Chocolaaaaaaate raaaaaaaaahh!!!
tactical: captain 3 romulan warbirds have spotted us.
Captain: helmsman zet cours to ferderation space warp 8.
Helmsman: cours plotted.
Captain: Engage.
( i feel sorry for the guy who has to read through all of these )
"Again!?"
Or original quote:
"I was out saving the galaxy when your grandfather was in diapers" -- Kirk
:lol: Women bad drivers, worse spaceship pilots.
Don't be, we're still laughing at most!
(CHT = Collection, Holding and Transfer = where the human waste goes)
*the captain facepalms*
Captain's Log: "Today we arrived at planet 3411 to find nothing but a field of space debris..."
Firt officer:its not now
Cmdr. Deanna Troi- "Just a little gravimetric turbulence, sweety"
The likelihood of having an "accident" increases with every drink a driver takes. Here's a prime example of what can happen when you're dunk at the helm of a starship.
.
.
Spok: Yes Mister Zulu?
.
.
.
.
.
Mister Zulu: There's a scratch in the hull.
Captain: What Planetoid?
Person 1: Ah, yes, What planetoid??
Captain: *whisper* Get us out of here, before someone notices.
"I told ye tha bumbers 'd work, cap'n"
No of course not. They'll be fine. Just keep going.
We should really stop and make sure that...
I SAID KEEP GOING!!!
Little Billy: "But mom, Sally sitting too close and she has cooties!"
Little Sally: "Nuh uh! He's hogging the whole seat!"
Mom: "So help me! I will turn this thing arou.........." , "What was that?"
Dad: "Nice Driving Judy." "Think the insurance company will believe this one?"
I told you not to mix those Klingon peppers with the Saurian brandy.
Ensign: Sorry sir, It's my first day.
--NX-51001
Chekov: Oh, it was great!
Chekov eyes the detonation button thinking..."Stinking Klingons made me eat Klah!"...CLICK!
field is approximately three thousand, seven hundred and twenty to one."
-Captain Philis Romane, shortly after the destruction of a pre-warp civilization's world. She is now a security guard at Star Fleet.
Captain- "we don’t have insurance, I couldn’t pay the premiums because we don’t use money in the 24th century! Floor it!"
Sir, would you mind stepping out of the vehicle? Sir Do you know how fast you were going back there?
2 litres of Klingon blood
1 pieces Ferengi ear
5 ounces Talaxia flake
a pinch of nanoprobe
a little "PAH"
and the most important one the human perseverance
Cooking time 2-3 years
"It's the principle of the thing!"
( Heavy Payload Missle hits plant on screen)
1st Officer: Captain what in the frack did you just do??
Captain: OH! Shit!! I've done it this time maxiam warp out of this space now!!!! If anybody asks we were never here, got that.
Crew: Whatever you say Captain.
Captain: Alright we need to erase all logs of this incedent, Lets get working on it.
Starfleet's latest refit, comming from great scientists, and engineers at Utopia Planitia Ship Yards.
Rocking a world near you!
Stardate....today.
Preliminary "Genesis Torpedoe" field trial results:
I believe our onboard head researcher said it best when she said...
"Opps...ummmm....back to the drawing board. Guess I can't quite cook good just yet."
End log.
On Discovery: Helmsmen: Captain! This was a bad idea because I was just hailed from the Planet!"
'Mmmmm. Mr. Christie, you make good.....planets.'
Enough dilithium crystals for 30 days: 1 million credits
Accidentally ejecting the warp core when you meant to vent plasma: PRICELESS
"...I, hate, spiders..."
Engineroom: Err, captain, have you ever tried to speed up on warp without warpcore???
Captain: No, whats happend with the warpcore?
Engineroom: Well, the warpcore has been ejected.
Captain: What the... Why??!!
Engineroom: Err... in this books were written, that a warpcore explosion can destroy a planet. I wanted to try it.
Captain:You ejected.. the Warpcore...??? What for a book??
Engineroom: Five ways to kill a planet.
-Chief Science Officer
"The U.S.S. Trojan Horse lives up to its name."
or
"Captain, should we leave a note?"
Captain whistling "Oh hey look at that nebula behind us we should go explore it..."
I think we have a perfect job for him...
Takes You Through Many Places
The Prime Directive
"Because you never know when nailing an alien princess will cause a planetary war leading to armageddon"
Captain: Yea, I just skimmed that one....why?
Helmsman: No Sir! I can't afford any more points on my license!
Giant Space Alien Milk Dud: 0
You guys see that?
Next up: Qo'noS!
P.S. Federation Rules!!!
"...I, hate, spiders..."
Picard: "Oh, fascinating. Twenty particles of space dust per cubic meter, fifty-two ultraviolet radiation spikes, and a class two comet. Well, this is certainly worthy of our attention..."
Porky Pig: B-b-b-b-big deal.
Helmsman: (Frantically erasing sensor logs) "Oh nothing, nothing, everythings fine, situation under control, no need to come up here..."
Kirk: ehhhhh What's happened?
Mccoy: oh my god Jim!!!!! Im a doctor not artilleryman
Second star to the right... and straight on till morning.
kirk: i like big macs more
You have to choose !
Ensign: "I think we all did Sir."
Captian shoots ensign with a phaser
Captain: "Like i said, noone saw that..."
There appears to be a foreign body in my malteaser
Captain: Tactical, are we still being pursued?
Tactical Officer: Captain, the sensors show that the vessel has been destroyed.
Captain: Good work, Helm take us into warp, and continue onto our destination.
Helm Officer: Yes sir, initiating the warp drive now.
The ship exits the system with minor damage and a story of an encounter that was far too close for their own good
Bob Marley:Man,when you are high everything is fast.
"Number One, you have the bridge."
Scotty: "What seeems the be the problem Ociffer??"
Captain:"Helmsman, what in creation was that??
Helmsman:*smirking* "Oooops... eh eh, sorry sir. Anyone has some superglue around? Eh eh"
Captain:"You have failed me for the last time, helmsman!"
Helmsman:"Arrrgh"*gasps for air*
Captain:"Computer, lock on to the helmsman´s coordinates. Beam him to the airlock."
Computer:"Helmsman has beamed to the airlock."
Captain:"Computer, open airlock."
Comms Oficcer:" Sir, Starfleet is hailing us. On screen."
Starfleet Admiral:"Captain, good to see you,how is everything? How is my son doing at the helm? Yeah, he´s my boy, i didn´t tell you earlier so you would treat him just like any other officer. He´s my pride and joy, that boy is.His mother would like to talk with him, is he around?"
Captain:" Oh s**t..."
Scotty: "What seems to be the problem Ociffer??"
***Could not edit or delete previous posting for some reason - Thread Admin please keep this posting and delete the previous - Thank you
Engineer: "Captain its to late we have had a full core dump!"
Now get us outta here... And use coordinates this time!
Engage.
Ensign at helm: "With all-due respect sir, not anymore."
Captain: If im right i have seen them before.
Helmsman:What Captain what did we just hit?
Captain: Not again i only just managed to survive last time, they are too powerful, the melt in your mouth chocolate and the crunchy white center they boldly took me where no chocolate had took me before.
Dame you maltesers DAME yooooooou......
..."Deanna, take the Helm!"